Bridging the gap...it’s such a catchy word. When you really
start bridging the gap you have with your loved ones it becomes bridging the G..........A.........P...........S...........
Why is it that maximum problems we have in a relationship are
with our close ones? Why many times we can’t just say sorry to the people who matters
the most? The parent who have given us birth, who has seen us naked when we are children...why do we try to hide our feelings and desires from
them? Why we get so afraid of them? (remember even if you are a rebel...it is
still a form of fear). What engulfs our relation with our parent when we grow
up.
Relationship with our siblings is the first relation we experience where we get to learn the values of
sharing, caring, protectiveness; we get to learn to fight, make- up and
resolve; we get to learn the lessons of first tolerating the other human being -
accepting him/her -loving them as your own; people say that after marriage the
love between the sibling is lost. Why?
What happens to these first and primal relationships of our
life? Does money, competition, sibling rivalry, lack of communication, big ego,
and anger take such a deep rooted place in our life that we are not able to
fill those G.A.P.S. OR
Are there some other deep – seated problems...say like,
parents always thinking that their child will be a child no matter how much he
grows up ...and forget to respect their wishes, desires, their choices; Do
siblings forget to give space to each other after marriage? Do we have so much
anger and hatred towards each other that we forget that our parents and our sibling
are the people we loved the most? As we grow up do we forget to define and re –
define our personal and relationship boundaries? Do we forget to respect each
other’s personal space?
These boundaries are those fine, thin, and transparent lines
which surround every one of us. In spite of them being fine and thin, if it is
being crossed, violated, and destroyed...can create havoc in relationships. If
these boundaries are understood...a parent or a sibling is not only respecting
but also being supportive to their closed ones wishes, choices, right to
freedom, and right to live the way he/she prefers.
Why aren’t we taught to respect these boundaries while we
are growing up? Why aren’t the most important matters of relationship not given
importance in our precious years of education? Why aren't we taught along with
competition the importance of being supportive, helping and co – operating with
each other? Why aren’t we taught that rather than controlling our loved ones it’s
much more satisfying to empower them to take control of their own lives? Why
aren’t we taught to express our love freely and openly towards the people we
love the most....why are we so afraid to say, “I LOVE YOU”? Why are we so naive in things that matter?
Well, there are a lot of questions that need to be answered,
there are a lot of un – dissolved and un – resolved anger, guilt and hatred
that needs to be dissolved and resolved, you want to melt your ego, learn new
ways to work towards your relationships with the people you love the
most...Well, we @FUDOL (fillingupthedash-esoflife) Therapies may not have all the answers to your
Whys but, definitely we can be your support and your backbone while you are getting
your answers, while after a long time you are saying these golden words “I Love
You” to your closed ones, while you giving just a simple HUG to your closed
ones which will dissolve, resolve and melt all the ego.
So make an appointment if you think you need help and
support when you re – learning how to work with the most important thing that
matters.
DARSHA Gandhi Mehta
(Psychotherapist & Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Past Life Regression Therapist; Colour & Aura Therapist, Graphologist, Angel & Crystal Advisor)
We Do Online & Phone Counselling Sessions
+(91) 9869660362; contact@fudoltherapies.com
Darsha, this is a very profound, yet very basic & foundational issue you have elaborated here. This is what education really pertains to. It is a very thought provoking read.
ReplyDeleteParticularly, these lines from your post strike a chord with my feelings:
"Do we forget to respect each other’s personal space? These boundaries are those fine, thin, and transparent lines which surround every one of us. In spite of them being fine and thin, if it is being crossed, violated, and destroyed...can create havoc in relationships. If these boundaries are understood...a parent or a sibling is not only respecting but also being supportive to their closed ones wishes, choices, right to freedom, and right to live the way he/she prefers."
and
"Why aren’t we taught to express our love freely and openly towards the people we love the most....why are we so afraid to say, “I LOVE YOU”? Why are we so naive in things that matter?"
Warmly,
Sujat.